>> Thursday, November 19, 2009
It is a gloomy day today. Oddly enough I really love this type of day but I have been afraid to say so for years. The sun is behind the clouds and I don't have a headache for once. I also love those clear fall evening when you can see the moon through the leafless trees. I while I love spring too with all its life I still prefer the beauty of the colder months while life is hibernating. Most things don't really die, the leaves come back the grass turns green again and all is well.
I have been thinking a lot about this lately, I have been rather irritated by fellow Christians lately. Not my close friends just some people out there who think you need to be all "happy" all the time to be a good Christian. Not so much content, but like visibly joy filled even when life sucks. Some people act like I can't have faith because of the books I read. They believe they are satanic because vampires and werewolves are satanic. Now if you want to attack these books there are plenty of other things to attack but I really don't think satanists invented vampires and werewolves. I also don't think they are realistic (they are fiction) and I am not going to turn into a satanist because i have read them.
How does this tie into my outlook on life, well I like dark things and always have. I love the whole Gothic look and I tend to like the way my dark red roses look in more in the fall when they turn black than I do mid summer when they are a crimson color. I have often been told that the color I like is evil. The parts of life that I enjoy are of the Devil. I just don't buy it; the Bible I read must be missing some parts or I'm interpreting it wrong. Maybe I am, if that is the case then there is no place for me in the Heaven these people believe in and I really don't want a space there. I am going to go on believing that God just created me a little different. God also created the seasons as well as life and death and black and white. If I don't make it to Heaven because my faith is flawed then I suppose that is what was meant to be. Maybe I should write something creative about this stuff.
I do not have any classes until Monday and that is my only day of classes next week.
I am looking forward to getting a lot of reading done after I finish classes. For the next three weeks I will be working my but off to get all the projects I have to do finished. I started the Curse the Dawn but I think I will have to start that over. I am going to work on one of the Audio books this weekend as I clean and drive around to run errands. I think I will start with Tempted the latest House of Night novel by P.C. and Kristin Cast.